Alec Baldwin yells at Pope in Rome, calls him ‘Your Holy F****t’ for approaching wife

It was only a matter of time. Italian media outlets are reporting that while vacationing in Rome, actor Alec Baldwin got into an altercation with Pope Francis. The ex-MSNBC “Up Late” host, recently fired for directing a gay slur at a reporter on the streets of New York, allegedly called the head of the Catholic Church “Your Holy F****t.”  The pontiff apparently got too close to the Baldwin’s wife, Hilaria Thomas, while the couple were walking along the Piazza Navona.

“The Pope was not even supposed to be here, but he freed up some time in his busy schedule to wash the feet of the city’s poor,” said mailman Mario Gizzepi. “That’s  …when it happened. I’ll never forget it,” whispered Mr. Gizzepi. He stuttered his words as he spoke. “I heard that his lawyers go after those who speak out. I probably should not have given you my name.”

According to Mr. Gizzepi, Pope Francis — Time’s ‘Person of the Year’ — extended his hand in Mrs. Baldwin’s direction as the two neared each other. The actor, sensing that the pontiff was up to no good, quickly slapped down his hand. Baldwin then puffed out his chest and threatened to “excommunicate your teeth from the inside of your mouth.” When the pope again extended his hand to show the actor that he meant no harm, that’s when the gay slur took place.

He said, “No thanks, Your Holy F****t. Just stay away from my wife and kid.” The pope, unshaken, smiled and continued tending to the poor.

The Vatican released the following statement only hours after the incident took place:

Today, while the Holy Father was spreading God’s love on the streets of Rome, he had an encounter with American actor Alec Baldwin. The Catholic Church will respectfully decline all media requests for the pope’s characterization of the event; God will judge Alec Baldwin. Pope Francis simply sees the actor as a child of God, and as such will treat him with the kindness and dignity God expects all of his children to show one another. The Catholic Church reminds us that the grace of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is with us always. We ask that you pray for Alec Baldwin and wish him the peace of mind and softened heart that comes to all those who allow the Holy Spirit to wash over them.

“Why would a man do such a thing?” said street merchant Luigi Ramondi. “It’s almost reached the point of satire. This guy needs to pull himself together.”

A spokesperson for Alec Baldwin refused to comment, despite requests by multiple wire services.

Alec Baldwin is scheduled to begin filming a bit part in the long-awaited sequel to Adam Sandler’s 2003 hit “Anger Management.” The actor will ironically play a gay Buddhist monk in “Anger Mismanagement.”

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