Leviathan Fetus Ad Campaign To Take on Planned Parenthood

What happens when 53 million fetuses gather into one place? Fetus Leviathan...or was that Planned Parenthood's worst nightmare?

The National Right to Life has until recently only been known for two things: 1. Their staunch defense of the pro-life movement, and 2. A really crappy website. All that is about to change as they unleash a full frontal media assault on Planned Parenthood with…Fetus Leviathan! (or Baby Leviathan depending on your perspective). For years organizations like March for Life have drawn huge crowds, but scant media attention. With “Baby Leviathan”, The National Right to Life promises to give birth to a commercial that will be covered around the water cooler for a week.

In short, the discarded fetuses (or corpses?) of millions of babies are resurrected into a giant uber-fetus that springs forth from the ocean—Mother Earth—to confront Planned Parenthood operatives. Aspects of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol are also undeniable.

NRL President Carol Tobias weighs in:

53 million abortions since 1973. That’s astounding. Think of the national debt and stack up those dollar bills. Now think of four decades of abortions, and stack up those babies. Besides not being as stack-friendly as currency, it’s a disturbing visual, isn’t it? Well, we think the American people will see it that way too. We’re going to shift the debate with this ad buy, I promise.

Asked for a response, Planned Parenthood’s President, Cecile Richards, was defiant:

Guess what? To paraphrase Thomas Hobbes: “Life is nasty, brutish, and short—especially if you’re an unwanted fetus. Hobbes didn’t say that last bit…but the point is, the pro-life movement is wrong. Dead wrong (pardon the pun, I can’t help myself). There hasn’t been a genocide of 53 million people since 1973; Planned Parenthood has been a small part of saving the planet from 53 million carbon-dioxide emitters, rising crime, and abject poverty. The color of abortion is green. The right just doesn’t know it yet.

For many years the right has held prayer vigils outside abortion clinics. While prayer can be a powerful tool, in this instance it seems to have succeeded in…congregating a lot of really quiet people on really busy city sidewalks (interesting to look at, but not an effective deterrent to abortion for the less religious among us). Hopefully, this new ad campaign is a sign from God that they need to play hard ball.

Planned Parenhood has proven it can bring a coat hanger to a knife fight and win. But will they prevail (or partial-birth prevail?) against an all star marketing firm? Only time— perhaps a trimester—will tell.

This post was saved from a back alley dumpster filled with discarded satire, a beautiful bit of prose no one wanted. Saved by a good (but bizarre) doctor.